Consider It All Joy

Today has been a rough day. There has been the usual parenting stuff-kids vomiting, whining, arguing. The cousins spent the night last nite as part of my elaborate plan to make life easier for myself and my sister in law. But the plans were foiled when middle son started vomiting at 4 am and one by one all of the kids started waking up. Then we just had one sick kid, one caffeine deficient mother, a sleeping father and 4 extra kids. However, I will say that for a few brief moments, while I had my daughter, my niece and my middle son all hunkered in bed with me and my nephew and oldest son asleep in the other room (Lee exiled himself to the guest room) I felt like I was doing something right. Even though we had everyone rambling around different beds (girls on floor, girls on bed, boys on floor, boys on bed, husband on bed, husband in guest room, niece in bed with cousins, niece on floor with aunt, everyone awake by 5:30 am), this is how summer should be, spending the night with your cousins and staying up late (or in this case, getting up early).

By 9 am I was ready for a nap and lucky for me, our babysitter was here, but that's when the scream-fest began. My niece, who is 2 yrs old, had been up since 4:30 am and her usual cheery disposition was overshadowed by sleep deprivation. My daughter was hell bent on doing her best Sybil impersonation and when my sister in law tried to take her and her cousin for a walk, she began shreaking so loudly that I thought she was being abducted. Erroneously, I had thought that I would be able to get some sleep while my sick kid was sleeping. I was jolted out of my pre-slumber state by my daughter's howls and I reluctantly got out of bed to try to do some damage control. With the TV tuned to Sponge Bob (with nearly 300 channels, we can always find a channel showing Sponge Bob) I tried to sleep on the sofa while my daughter watched TV, but like clockwork, she would poke me in the ribs just as I was about to drift out of consciousness. When my oldest son called me from swim practice to tell me he missed me (he had been taken by a neighbor) and could I please come and stay with him at the pool (this was 5 minutes after the practice began) I realized that it was not meant to be. The gods did not ordain sleep as part of my destiny.

Because middle kid fell of our tread mill yesterday, husband and I were concerned about his complaints of headache and his persistent vomiting. Seventeen years of combined medical training and nineteen years of combined practice has made us nothing if not overly neurotic when it comes to our kids' health. Since neither one of us are pediatricians, our kids might as well be donkeys when it comes to diagnosing their ailments. We know as much about pediatrics as we do veterinary medicine. So, mid day was punctuated with a trip to the kids' doctor just so she could tell us that it was indeed a viral illness and not some traumatic brain injury that we had feared. Thankfully she gave us a pass on the judgement call of allowing a six year old on a treadmill (it's not our fault that he increased the speed to 7 miles/hour when we weren't looking).

As I am writing this I am watching Dottie, the newest member of our family, do her damnest to try to escape the cage in which she is imprisoned. I finally relented to my daughter's pleas and I bought her a rodent. It's a little mouse and even I've got to admit that it's kind of cute. Dottie, realizing that her tormentors are no where in sight, has decided that now is the time to make a quick get-away. Unsuccessfully, she has tried to chew her way through every corner of the cage. I can see her over there training. Trying to get bigger, stronger, faster by racing on her little wheel and doing drills in her little tunnel. She is determined to have her persistance pay off because I think she knows the alternative-one of her youthful caretakers will unwittingly assasinate her.

The worst part of the day was learning that a breast cancer acquaintence died in May. She was 40 years old and she is survived by her husband and 2 daughters, 13 and 7 years old. I've spent a good part of the day mourning her death and quite honestly, mourning my inclusion in this unfortunate club. This woman was such a lovely person and a true angel when I was first diagnosed. She never failed to send me encouraging notes and she brought me holy water from a cathedral in NYC and a worry/prayer cross. The last time she and I talked I knew that her death was not too far in the distant future. I think that she had hoped that I might be able to help her in some way due to my profession. I think I wanted her to be a window into my future, but a window that did not include death. In the end I think I was a coward. I think I pulled away from her because I couldn't handle the fact that she was going to die. Breast cancer sucks. Everyone should be able to live happily ever after or at the very least until their children are out of college. Children shouldn't be left motherless, especially not 13 and 7 year old children. For as much as I kvetch about motherhood on this blog, every moment with my family is a priviledge and I don't want to be short-changed one single second. I would like to rescind my membership in this club. The dues are too steep and there really aren't too many perks. Pray for me and pray for the women and the families who are affected by this disease.

James 1:2-4 "Dear brothers and sisters, whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be strong in character and ready for anything."